Liberal Mind

Tribute to a friend: Owolabi Olusola Stephen (25th July 1979 – 21st July 2013)

 

Adetunji Ayobrown

No man has power over the length of his life but we all have over the breadth and the depth of our existence. This I saw in the way and manner you lived your life, Owolabi Olusola Stephen rest in peace.
Your sudden departure filled my heart with many unanswered enquiries about life, some of the feelings, thoughts, good times and bad ones shared and unshared during your lifetime. When someone that is special to us is gone it can be difficult to continue living life, things that were special to you may begin to seem pointless when you don’t have that special person to share it with.
All of the things that we did together are reminders of the loss that many have suffered because of you. However, to do myself a favour, I took time to mourn your loss as I go through the stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance, memories of the good times we spent together brought a smile to my face instead of painful grimace, and I think this your spirit will love to see and be happy.
Life became meaningless and lost its values and importance when people who are suppose to be our confidants, strength, power and driving force are taken away abruptly and unexpectedly, but the Almighty, who created us knows better… Owolabi Olusola Stephen, in you I lost a friend and a brother.
It was exactly five years penultimate Saturday and was just like yesterday when the cold hand of death swept you away from us all. Wife, children, friends and family couldn’t but thank your creator who moulded you, though not perfect in human terms, but exactly to perfection as He thinks.
Few days to your 34th birthday celebration, Sunday 21st July 2013 came just like any other day, without a clue of what will happen next, but with a delivery of unexpected bumper package, such that was bigger than us all and I never pray for such again. Though, I was feverish for some days earlier and with all medications I was still not okay until Shola’s death was announced to me, then, my fever disappeared within a twinkle of an eye. Then I knew my feverish condition was just a pointer.
That day, when I came to my office, met him working on some materials to send to his News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) Abuja office, we interacted like the five and six we were. And after that we agreed on where to meet and what to do next, to which he suggested that we go to an old time friend. So, we did, not knowing that he wanted to bid them all fare well.
All those you met that day can testify to the fact that you did had a clue and premonition of  your death, even to say the least, you woke somebody up from sleep some few hours before death came calling. The person never believes till now, that truly you have departed this sinful world.
Though, life forced us to the path we supposed to have found ourselves, Owo as he was popularly called among friends and acquaintances, was a rare gem, even in death, it was a sad and irreplaceable loss when the news of your death was announce…how I wished that day never came, but nature doesn’t listen to anyone but its rhythms as programmed by the creator.
Before now, I was unable to write for you because the shock of your sudden departure was still very fresh in my memory even after many years. This is a testimony of those whose path your life crossed, Owo, you always have a positive mind set, impacted in no small measures on all. Life without you is never the same again….but life must go on.
I could remember, we both attended the International Institute of Journalism (IIJ), Ilorin Campus in 2007, all thanks to you as it was your comradeship and friendship that made something out of me, by agreeing with you to do the post graduate course just as an extension of my career…
Your death has taught me a big lesson, better to die a hero than live like a coward; no wonder the Yoruba adage says, ‘Ka ku lomo de ko y?ni, o kuku san ju ki a di agbalagba ki ama ni adiy? irana…you lived a fulfilled but short life.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote, ‘we are architects of fate, living in this walls of time, so look not mournful into the past, it comes not back again’, explains my pain, my twinge and sorrow of many hearts that had you in a way or the other.
Some said it should not be you, some asked why it had to be you and some thought if it was you, what next? Whatever and wherever side one belongs to on this, we are all right and correct in our own respect, but what I know about you will live with me just like many others till eternity. After all, ‘Il? su omo si ona, won ni o l’aya, ti ko ba ni aya nko? Meaning, faith is trusting and believing when there is nothing else to do.
Rest in the bosom of your Lord and Saviour, till will meet to part no more. Olusola, you were my friend but also my brother and till eternity you remain so. Rest on pal!
Shola Owolabi until his death worked with the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN), Ilorin Office.
Ayobrown, Senior System Analyst, National Pilot
Newspaper, writes via [email protected]

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